Lennox Victoria Ellen

She loves being outside playing ❤️❤️

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My story

talktomummy:

So I guess to start everything off I should introduce myself and give you my back story so that way you know who I am and what I am about.

My name is Amber, I am 21 years old, I have a beautiful little girl named Lennox, I am engaged to the lovely Eric, and we have a wonderful dog who is also part of our crazy story. We live in Port Saxon , Nova Scotia. We are currently in the process of buying a house (crazy right).
So Lennox is our first child she was born February 25th, 2016 at 6:45 am. (the day before her due date). I had what felt like the worse Labour I will ever experience. It started around 12:00pm on the 24th after my last prenatal appointment, I had gotten the membrane sweep, and my Labour had started to progress due to the fact my cervix was 80% effaced and I was 1cm dilated. Eric and I went about our normal day like we would any other day after prenatal, we went to Walmart got a few more baby things, and went home, where I finished packing our hospital bags with the final things we would need. It was around 3:00pm when I started having contractions about 30 minutes apart and not very strong so I went for a walk (I actually just walked Eric’s mom’s driveway since it is so steep) I did three laps, I went in side to eat a nice supper, and relaxed for a few minutes. I then ran down the stairs as fast as any women at 39 weeks pregnant could, and vomited, I was stuck in the bathroom for what felt like forever. So I got worried and asked Erics mother if it was normal. She had then explained to me I was in active Labour. I got scared, I always imagined the time I would go into labour but I wasn’t expecting it to be right then. I walked back and forth in the bedroom grabbing bottles, milk, my phone charger, laptop, snacks, and Slippers when I curled over the edge of the bed and laid there crying. Eric had heard me and was already by my side right then. I sat for another hour timing my contractions they were 7 minutes apart. I lived 45 minutes away from the hospital so I called Labour and delivery, told them how far away I lived, how far apart my contractions were, and they told me to come in and get checked. It was about 9:00 at this point. We walked to Eric’s mom’s and we jumped in her car as Eric’s mother and sister brought us to the hospital. We got there and I had my cervix checked and I was 4cm dilated so they kept me.
I tried to have a bath to ease my back to back contractions but I just couldn’t. My Labour and contractions were all in my back. At about 1am I got the epidural, what a blessing in disguise. That was perfect and allowed me to get some sleep for about 45 minutes. They then woke me up to check my cervix again and I was 9cm, they said it could take awhile for the last cm so Eric laid down on the cot, he closed his eyes for maybe 20 minutes when my water broke. At this point in the night my epidural wore off as did the narcotics and I was drug free..
It was time, she was coming and I was scared. They looked at me and said “amber it’s time to push” my heart raced but I knew I would have my baby soon. They braced me and I pushed, it was the worse pain I have felt in my entire life, I couldn’t help but let out a God awful scream, the whole 45 minutes it took me to push this little 7 pound baby out I screamed my face off. I hurt so bad. Once her head was out I asked the doctors if I was done. But apparently only the hard part was over. And few seconds later I had a beautiful little girl laying on my chest and my heart was full.

8 months I have watched this little girl grow and shape who I am. She has changed my life so much in such a little while.

During all of this, what the biggest change for me to adapt to isn’t being a mom, or having a human rely on me. It’s the mom bod. I have had a really hard time losing the baby weight, on top of all my new stretch marks I gained. My whole life I have never seen the scale step over 115 pounds. And now I look at the scale and I become depressed at what I have become.. I feel like a slob and even though I gave birth to a beautiful little lady I still haven’t been able to adapt to this change. It is a struggle every day that I am trying so hard to work with.

My wedding is in August of 2017 so I have 35-40 pounds to shred in 288 days. I need to lose this weight for me. Not for anyone else but so I can feel good about myself.